"A girl's heart should be so wrapped up in God that a guy has to seek him to find her"

So I've learned a lot in my life and those teachings have definitely come in handy throughout the week. I've learned that no guy can ever pressure me into doing things I don't want to do. I have learned that I can say no with confidence and not guilt. I've learned that no guy will ever treat me wrong like my daddy did when he was with my mom. I've learned that a guy can never change the decisions I make for my life. I have learned that I need to find a guy who not only respects me, but himself as well. I have learned that I need to focus on my life and what is best for me above all things. I have learned that no one can tell me what to do, where to go, or how to live my life. I have learned that God does so many things for a reason. He brought me this so called boy to me to test my decisions and my beliefs, and God has truly showed me so much this week. He has showed me that I can do anything as long as I allow Him to be right next to me every step of the way. I have learned that I can respect myself and have enough dignity for myself. I have learned that the ONLY guy who can ever break my heart is my daddy because he will always come back and I can never be mad at him. I love my daddy and all of the mistakes he has made. HE is the one who has taught me to NEVER date or even marry a guy who treats me the way he treated my mom. My dad owns up to his mistakes and he learns from them even if I don't agree with that on every situation. My mom has taught me how to be strong and how to make the decisions I have made and will make in the future. My grandma and my aunt have taught me how to have respect for myself and have enough dignity for myself. My sister has taught me how to become a happy person by the good decisions I make for myself. She has taught me to wait for that guy who truly loves me for me. My sister has done that and I must say my new brother will be the BEST husband to her and I love him to death because he has respect for himself and my sister! And then there's Mrs. Ray and Mrs. Moore! These ladies are just amazing! It's great to have family to teach you so many things throughout your life and I'm thankful to have that kind of family, but it's awesome to have 2 women outside of my family who care about me, love me, and who teach me so many things about life. Mrs. Ray, you were SO right when you said, "the only thing boys want are THESE and THIS!" You 2 women crack me up and yall have taught me so many things about life and about the things I've been through and how to stay strong. You 2 women will always be in my heart and EVERYTHING yall have taught me will go with me forever and it will help me get through every decision I make. I can truly feel God on my heart everyday, helping me make decisions and testing those decisions by throwing obstacles my way and I'm so glad I'm a strong enough person to stand my ground and not back down from the decisions I make, the goals I shoot for, and the beliefs that I truly believe in!

Church Sermons

Today's sermon at church was awesome! On our church's sign outside it reads, "eat your vegetables," and we were all wondering what Pastor Dan meant by that. Well, that's what his sermon was all about this morning. He asked us to raise our hands if our parents or grandparents ever told us when we were little to eat our vegetables because they're good for us. Hands went up and he explained to us how he thought his grandmother loved him until she put nasty bushell sprouts on his plate as a child, and we all laughed. He told us even his wife "nags I mean fusses" at him to eat his vegetables (his wife wasn't in there and he told us, "just like Las Vegas, what's said in this church, stays in this church" lol). But he told us how when our parents and/or grandparents tell us to eat our vegetables, they say that because they love us and because vegetables are good for us. The same with God and church. Without either one, we don't feel well. Not sick, but empty. Without God in our lives, we're lost and empty.

Last week's sermon was good as well. Pastor Dan compared our relationship with God to spelling. If we don't start off spelling with the correct letter, we'll never spell it correct. It'll be a whole different word. Just like our relationship with God. If we skip steps to reach Him, or if we don't come to Him first, it's all wrong. It's not the same at all if we don't spell with the correct letter or come to God FIRST with our problems. He should always be the first one we go to; not second, not third, FIRST.

Proverbs 3:3: "Let love and faithfulness never leave you …write them on the tablet of your heart."

Lessons Learned

This week has totally opened up my eyes. I've learned who my true friends are, who I can trust and who I can't, and who I can tell EVERYTHING to. I've also learned not to push away from someone because of their frustrations and instead, be with that person even if they are frustrated, and not to push away from them because even though they may be mad at the world and take their frustrations out on you, YOU'RE probably the one they need the most at that given time. You have to push through that persons' flaws, not push away from them. Everyone has flaws and we all need to take those flaws and accept them.

It's getting nearer and nearer until the day I graduate and EVERY SINGLE TIME I think about it, it terrifies me to know that I will have to leave SO many people behind. I have to go my separate path and they theirs. It scares me to death! All of these questions come flooding in my head like: What will happen to my friendship with all of these amazing people in my life? When will I ever see them again? Will that separation change us and make us drift apart? So many questions! But then I think to myself, yes we will change because of that separation because we'll be out of our routine of seeing each other everyday and walking to class together everyday and yes, we won't see each other as often as we would like....but all I have to do is handle it and put it in God's hands. I have to handle the goodbyes and the hardships of leaving my friends behind just like EVERYONE else does. Yes, it'll hurt SO bad that I may feel like giving up, but I CAN'T! God didn't make me or anybody for that matter, to be quitters and give up everything just because of hardships. It will be SO hard to say goodbye, there will be tears flowing and hearts breaking, but we all just have to give it all to God and He'll take care of it all as long as we trust in Him and give Him 100% EVERYTHING! Isn't that amazing?!?! I think that's just so amazing how you can have all these troubles in your life, but turn to God and trust in Him and put everything in His hands...and He'll handle it and let things get better for you.

I have set the Lord always before me. Because he is at my right hand, I will not be shaken. (Psalm 16:8)

The eternal God is your refuge, and underneath are the everlasting arms. (Deuteronomy 33:27)

I sought the Lord, and he answered me, and delivered me from all my fears. (Psalm 34:4)

God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear, though the earth give way and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea, though its waters roar and foam and the mountains quake with their surging. (Psalm 46:1-3)

Welcome to Life In The Food Chain of Stereotypical-ism

Wow! What a day! I really have to share this so here it goes:

So, I walked into 4th block today thinking everything will go normal: pick up worksheets from the back table, grab a book, sit down, hear Mrs. Cunningham talk, go over homework, and start on the worksheets, like a normal day. Well, I was wrong. Yes, we walk in and grab a book (there were no worksheets to grab) and sit down to wait on Mrs. Cunningham and everything. Well, she tells us to get out the worksheets from Friday, so we did, and we start going over them. But then we get side-tracked when we stopped at the Battle of Gettysburg. Mrs. Cunningham asked one question about the Battle of Gettysburg, something about how black and white people were different back during the Civil War, and all of a sudden it turns into this whole debate-like situation. There is one black guy in our class, and I must say, he is the COOLEST black guy I've ever met. He's just really laid back and funny as mess. Well this other guy (not mentioning any names), goes off and says, "See he's 'normal'. He doesn't dress like these other black people around the school thinking he's all cool. No, he doesn't do that. But I really hate how all of these black people, and a lot of white people do this too, but how they all hoop and holler through the hall ways and how they push and shove you by saying, 'hey white boy! It's so aggravating when we're here to have an education, not to act like monkeys."

That statement really offended me and a lot of others offended me, too. THIS IS 2009! Why are we STILL acting like nothing's changed between races. I know some people who are racist and hey, that's their decision, whatever floats their boat, but seriously, come on! This isn't 1950 junk. Times have changed!

People in the class went on and said that black people are stereotyped because of the clothing they wear and the way they act, and that goes towards EVERYONE, not just black people. Yes, when you dress a certain way, you tend to act a certain way, but that doesn't mean you're a "bad person". You can't judge someone for that. Shoot, you shouldn't judge anyone at all. It doesn't matter what color our skin is or where you come from. We shed the same color blood, we were made the same way, we were all made by God! And I really don't understand how people sit there and judge people because they're "different". EVERYONE IS DIFFERENT. NO ONE PERSON IS THE SAME!

I was talking to Kendall, the only black guy in our class, about how one of guys that said a bunch of stuff mentioned above, has done bad things too. This guy said that black people are stereotyped as "bad" because of the way they dress. Well this same guy has made some mistakes also that I won't mention, but for someone to sit there and say things like that when they have not made the brightest decision makes me a little angry. EVERYONE MAKES MISTAKES! No one person is perfect. We make mistakes and LEARN FROM THEM, and move on with our lives. But for someone to judge someone because of what they wear, is ridiculous.

Another thing that someone said is how Mexicans, Asians, and other ethnic backgrounds come to America and "try to change our country by speaking THEIR language". I know that in schools today, we are required to have 2 of the same foreign language to graduate, and I hear a lot of people say, "well why are WE, as an English-speaking country, required to learn THEIR language?" Last time I checked this is AMERICA, where everyone is FREE: free to speak, free to have religion, free to do so many things! So, why? Why do people discriminate against people who come here to get away from the struggles they have to become FREE! Yes, the United States speaks mostly English, but why do people sit there and say, "THOSE people need to speak OUR language or they can go back to where they come from!" NO! That's totally not right. That's not right at all! Yes, they would be better off to LEARN English so they can get around and stuff, but don't sit there and say, "go back to where you came from!" That right there puts a bad name to the United States. And people really wonder why other countries speak badly of us. America was somewhere people could come to be free from struggles and free from getting treated badly. America shouldn't be about speaking English and all of these ridiculously rude things.

I also really despise labels. You know the prep, the jock, the skater, the thug, the emo, the dork, the nerd, all of it! It's stupid, and years from now, when MOST of us grow up, it won't matter! So, why don't we just drop it now while we're teenagers? If we see it as stupid now, we won't have to worry about people getting beat up because they're a "specific label" and they won't get picked on either. I just don't understand. Yes, I know it's high school and yes, I know there are a lot of things that go on and around the school, but seriously why let the color of someones' skin get in the way of being friends with them? I really think people need to grow up and get passed the issues that OUR ANCESTORS had to face! OUR ANCESTORS! Some kids in my class said that EVERYONE has a label and that you can look around and NO labels mix together, and that's a load of bull crap! I can tell you that I am NOT a label. And I mix with so many different people. And I'm not the only one. You can DRESS "preppy" and still be really really smart. You can DRESS like a "thug" and still be really really smart! Labels have no meaning what so ever! You dress "preppy", but not every "prep" acts the same. It's just all stupid! We go to school for an EDUCATION, not to show off and try to be cool and brag about things we have. That's the thing about school now. Everyone is SO focused on what they look like and how they act and present themselves, that they are failing in school. How dumb does that sound? But it's totally true!

We should ALL come together and ACT equal and I mean truly ACT! Not just PRETEND! We must all come together before this country goes even more downhill than it already is. If we come together and look past the race, the color, the CLOTHES, than we will become a stronger country and maybe, just maybe, rise above all of this mess that's going on! It's time to change! And it's time to drop what our ANCESTORS have started. And no one can do it, but ourselves.

"And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you." Ephesians 4:32

"By this shall all men know that you are my disciples, if you have love one to another."
John 13:35

Psalm 3:5-6

Goodness I feel extremely good right now even though I am COMPLETELY confused about so many things. Isn't that weird? I think yes, but anyway. I can really feel God move me lately and I must say, it's an amazing feeling and I can't even explain it. It's really hitting me hard that I have only about 2 months until I graduate, and then about 5 months until I leave for college. I know I'm ready though. I keep on thinking about it over and over again through my head of how things will be on my last day of high school. How many goodbyes I'll say, how many people I'll leave behind, and just so many scenarios go through my head. I know that I'm so ready. God is just moving me towards this one dream I have and I'm so ready to fulfill it. I'm just staying on God's path the whole way through and I pray that I can stay on it. Well, I'm about to go to bed. Yes I know, I'm an old lady...haha! By the way: it's SO gorgeous outside, well it was today. It just feels really good outside at the moment that I have an urge to go sleep outside...lol but I won't...goodnight my fellow readers! =]

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight." Psalm 3:5-6

The Mystery of the Pretty Indian Lady

I HAVE to share this! So, my brother is in love with the "Indian Lady". Well not IN LOVE, but he really likes her just because she has cool stuff in her classroom. He told me the other day, "are you going to go see that Indian pretty lady today?" And I told him, "why yes I am." He goes on and asked me who Amber (our older sister) is marrying, and I told him, "Jon Ryan, you silly boy!" and he said, "oh, well who are you marrying, Mariah?" By this time, I was totally confused and told him, "Dakota, I am too young to get married, who are YOU marrying?" And I was thinking that you know maybe he'd be like, "ew gross girls have cooties and I'm not going to get married!" Oh NO, he just paused and said, "I have someone in mind!" I was totally shocked that that just came out of a 9-year-old's mouth so I asked him, "oh really, and who may THAT be?" He said, "the pretty Indian Lady!" I was still confused and asked him who the "pretty Indian Lady" was and he said, "you know that pretty Indian Lady with the cool things like the car signy thingy?" Right when that came out of his mouth, I KNEW who he was talking about. And I was like, "WOAH Dakota, she is way too far out of your league!" He said, "Mariah she doesn't play baseball!" So I told him, "besides, you can't marry someone just because they have cool stuff, well you can, but that's not cool." So he said, "oh, ok well then I'll just marry that girl I met on the playground today!" bahahaha oh gosh my brother is adorable! Oh by the way, the "pretty Indian lady" would be Mrs. Moore and when I asked Dakota why he calls her that he said, "because she's dark and she's pretty!" bahaha that's what you get for being tan and pretty, Mrs. Moore!

Shocked

The worst words to hear come out of someone's mouth is the words telling you that your friend, family member, someone you love has passed away. Hollie Easterbrook, Laura-Ashley Boone and Laura-Ashley's stepmom, Luwanna, passed away yesterday morning when Luwanna lost control of the car. The car went air bourne and struck many trees, splitting the car in 2, killing all 3 of them on the scene. I knew Hollie. I met her a few years ago through some friends, and I'm sad I didn't get to know her better. It's so strange how you can talk to someone, and than they're gone just like that. Hollie has posted her status on Facebook as, "hoping it doesn't snow tomorrow." It's strange how you can set your status on Facebook as, "going out, be back later," and never come back. It's strange how you can talk to a friend and then hours later find out that they're gone. I know Hollie, Laura-Ashley and Luwanna are in safe hands now with the Lord and I know He's taking good care of them at this very moment. And we all have to be happy for them and say goodbye even though it hurts too much to. But we just have to stay strong and cope with it. Everything happens for a reason and I always believe that no matter how shocking the outcomes may be. My best friend Brittany knew Laura-Ashley and when I saw the look on Brittany's face today when she found out what had happened to her friend, I felt sick to my stomach. I just gave Brittany a hug, let her cry on my shoulder, reassured her that Laura-Ashley was safe now, told her to stay strong, and told her that I loved her. And the whole time, I felt so helpless even though Brittany told me I was helping her so much, I still felt helpless. But I guess that's all a friend needs, reassurance and comfort. It's so hard to lose a friend and you never know what the right thing is to say to a person who has lost someone. You just have to be there for them.

Everyone please pray for Hollie and Laura-Ashley's families and friends. Pray for Laura-Ashley's little sister Emmy. She lost a sister, a stepmother, and a best friend all at once. It's hard to lose someone, but it's extremely hard to lose 3 people all at once. Just pray that God will keep making her strong through all of this. Pray for their family and friends and pray to God that everyone gets through this. R.I.P. Hollie, Laura-Ashley and Luwanna. I know God is with all 3 of you women keeping you safe and letting you guys look down on all of us.

And do me a 2 favors: First: tell the people you love that you truly do love them. Don't go to bed angry with someone, don't slam the door of a car and never look back at your mom because you're mad at her, don't walk away from your best friend or boyfriend because you guys had a fight; because you never know what would happen to you or the person you're mad at. Settle the fights. Life is too short to hold grudges, have regrets, have fights and become angry with the people you love. Tell the people you love that you love them every chance you get.
And the 2nd: be extra careful on the road. I know I'm a teenager, but I can honestly say I don't speed. It's not cool at all, it's DANGEROUS! And wear your seat belt! All 3 of those women WERE wearing seat belts, but that's another think that I see on the road, not a lot of people wear their seat belts and I don't really comprehend that because that's a law. But anywho, wear that seat belt and please be safe on that road. Car wrecks are 100% preventable as long as everyone is safe and cautious on the road, so please be safe!

AMAZING weekend!

So, I just got back from Coastal Carolina and I must say, it's ABSOLUTELY GORGEOUS over there! My mom, sister, brother-in-law, and I went to Broadway at the beach yesterday and had a blast. We got out of the car and the first thing I noticed was a Disney Store so I just HAD to go in there. We used to have a Disney Store in the Columbiana Mall, but they turned it into something else, and let's just say I was NOT a very happy little girl at the moment..lol, but I was so stoked. So we went in there just to look around and I was kind of bummed because they didn't have the "old" Disney things that they used to when I was little like Winnie the Pooh, Aladdin, Cinderella, Little Mermaid and all that jazz stuff. They had all the "new" Disney things like Tinkerbell and all of the nonsense...lol so we cheesed it out of there. But yeah we went into almost every little store they had and Jon Ryan about had a cow since he was the only guy ha! I got to feed a duck though. My mom, sister, and Jon Ryan kept on picking on me because I looked like a little kid chasing those ducks...haha, but they came to me. The duck I fed was so hungry apparently and spilled all of the food out of my hand. Who wouldn't have thought a duck would like FISH food. haha! Well anyway, we ate at the Hard Rock Cafe and it was so cool in there! It kind of reminded me of Apple Bees with all of the stuff on the walls. We just had a lot of fun there! Then we went back to my sister's dorm after so many hours of shopping and we watched Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants 2 which was AMAZING to say the least!

Today we actually went to Myrtle Beach, and it was FREEZING, but so gorgeous! In my opionion, the beach is gorgeous no matter what the weather is like. It's just all the smells and this big surrounding of water that just overwhelms you! It had been raining the WHOLE time we were there, but we weren't going to let a ton of rain stop us from having fun. We walked on the beach for a total of 10 minutes, but I got some pretty cool looking shells so that's a plus =] But overall I had a blast and I want to go back when it gets a little warmer so we can actually walk on the beach for more than 10 minutes...haha!