I've been feeling very different lately, but a good kind of different. I've heard that every birthday you have, you don't feel all that different...except on your 18th birthday, and that's entirely true. I feel so accomplished so far. I feel like an actual adult now (even if I look like a 5th grader...lol). I have a career path chosen and I've known what that path is since 10th grade, and it's all thanks to God. I'm so glad He put me on my path. I intend to follow on this path and do everything possible to stay on it. God has truly opened my eyes this year, and I thank Him for that. I thank Him for the people He has brought in my life, and for the people who have truly impacted my life so much! I wouldn't be the same person without them.
I'll be heading off to Winthrop University before I know it, and I have so many mixed emotions about leaving Lexington. Lexington, the home I've known my whole life. I'm scared, nervous, excited, happy, worried, and unsure about so many things waiting ahead for me. I need to get away. I need to do this for myself. I want to be a high school math teacher, and everyone thinks I'm totally and completely NUTS for wanting to teach high school let alone math. Everyone's telling me I should go into art or photography or something because I'm so creative....but I believe in my heart that that's not what God wants me to do. A very special woman in my life told me once: "I've always wanted to follow in my daddy's footsteps and become an engineer...but then I was brought to teaching. I felt like God was putting me on this path for a reason. I've been through SO much in my life that I needed something to help me, and that's exactly what happened. Becoming a teacher isn't only about teaching a subject, it's being a role model and teaching life lessons as well. I felt like God was setting me to teach so I relate to at least one student and impact their lives and be there for them...while helping me, too."
I feel that that's exactly what God is doing for me. Yes, I might be crazy for wanting to be a HIGH SCHOOL teacher of all the things I could teach, but this is the path God is putting me on. I'm doing this for me and only me, not anyone else, and I cannot wait. A lot of people tell me that I won't be able to be a high school math teacher, but I know I will. I want to teach. I've always admired teachers and how they can get up in front of 20+ kids and teach those kids their knowledge, and even make a total goofball out of themselves. I think teachers are the bravest people.
Maybe I am crazy for wanting to jump right into the "big-league" of teaching high school instead of starting small, but God's telling me in my heart to do this, and I know with His help I can do it.
I pray that God will keep me on His path and not let me sway off of it. I pray that He will keep me stead-fast and ready for anything that gets thrown at me. I pray that He will lift me up in times of discouragement and hardship. I pray that He'll keep me strong. I pray that He'll get me through my senior year of high school with a positive attitude and a good mind-set on life. I pray that He'll get me through any obstacle I may face. I pray that He'll just be there for me and let me do everything for Him.
God bless, Mariah :)
Saturday, December 27, 2008
Wednesday, December 24, 2008
A Day In The Life of Dakota
I'm sitting here just eye balling Dakota (my little brother). I love his laugh! He's watching Spongebob on TV right now and he's just cracking up. I wonder, sometimes, what goes on in his mind. What his dreams REALLY are. What he thinks about throughout the day. Just what's going on in that mind of his. He changes his occupation goals everyday. One day he'll want to be a firefighter, then a doctor, then a math teacher, then a Kung Fu Fighter, then a mad scientist, then a superhero, the list goes on. Right now, he's set on 3 things: 1.) a "dinosaur bone digger" as he calls it (an Archaeologist), 2.) Indiana Jones...he wants to be just like Indiana Jones and go on adventurous quests, and 3.) a spy. He's SO amazing. God has truly blessed me with THE most amazing "big brother" I could've ever ask for. I say "big brother" because when Dakota was about 5 years old, he told me, "Mariah, when I'm taller than you, you'll become my little sister," and so I simply agreed with him. And look at him now, he's 9 years old, full of energy, TALLER THAN ME, and just an all around BOY! Dakota's always been the little runt, but "just shot up like a week" as my grandfather says it. He's the reason why I wake up EVERY morning with a smile on my face with no regrets.
Dakota is the miracle baby in the family. He passed away twice when he was born. I will NEVER forget the moment when my daddy came out and told us that Dakota wasn't doing so well. Dakota had the umbilical cord wrapped around his throat and stopped breathing. I was terrified that I wouldn't be able to see him. I remember I went into the Special Care and I held his little fingers and sang to him. I sang him the song my mom always sang to me when I was scared. "Que Sera Sera". I remember singing him that and he didn't take his eyes off me. I remember the 5 long and tiring days my family and I would spend going up to the hospital to see Dakota and staying strong for him. Dakota put up some fight, and I thank God that He made Dakota strong enough to prove all the doctors wrong and get better.
I've always believed that Dakota sees angels or something! I remember over the summer, Dakota and I were playing soccer, and I kicked him the ball...and he just stopped. He just looked up in mid air and just had the BIGGEST smile on his face. I tried getting his attention about 3 times, but he was just mesmerized by something. And then just kept on playing soccer. When he was a baby, I'd always go in his room because he'd wake me up from laughing so much in the middle of the night. I'd go in there and he'd be just a laughing and reaching for something. I remember 2 summers ago, Dakota and I would always get our quilt, make sandwiches and sweet tea, and go outside in our field and have a picnic. At night, we'd go out there and look at the stars. While we were out there looking at the stars one day, he asked me, "Mariah? Who's Jesus?" I told him that Jesus was a man who died on a cross for our sins; and when you die, you get to be with him in Heaven. He said, "Oh....well I've already met him." I just played along and said, "You have?" and he said, "Yeah, when I was a LITTLE tiny baby, he came with me." And I said, "Really? Where'd yall go?" and he said, "I don't know...EVERYWHERE!"...I couldn't say anything! We've never told him that he passed away when he was a baby before, or that he had complications when he was born....but I believe in my heart he DID get to meet Jesus. To hear that come out of 7 year old's mouth (he was 7 at the time), is just...AMAZING!
I love Dakota with all of my heart. He's my best friend and always will be no matter how many fights we get into, no matter how aggravating he will get, no matter how many times I have to tell him to get out of my room, no matter how loud he gets...NO MATTER WHAT! No one can get in between him and me. This little boy right here has my heart and always will. I have NO idea what I'm going to do without this funny, loving, sweet, adorable, little boy everyday when I go off to college in the fall. I won't be the same.
I thank God EVERY single day that He made Dakota my little brother. I thank Him that He let me have the opportunity to be a part of Dakota's life. I thank Him that He let Dakota change my life. I thank Him for letting me seeing a whole different side of life through Dakota. I thank God for just letting Dakota be a part of my life, and a huge part for that matter. Dakota can make me laugh when NO ONE else can. I definitely would NOT be the same person without him. I pray that Dakota gets everything he deserves out of life. I pray that God will let Dakota know that he is loved by SO many people, and that one day, he will change SO many lives just by being himself. I pray that God will always let him be the fun-loving, funny, and sweet little boy he's always been. I pray that God will put Dakota on a path that is his own. I pray that Dakota will follow his dreams and not let ANYONE tell him who to be or what to be. And I pray that Dakota will stay strong throughout the rest of his life just like he's always been. I love you, Dakota. Follow your dreams and NEVER EVER change for anyone!
Dakota wants to go outside and make pictures in the cloud now, so I'm going to go follow in his journey/quest.
Dakota is the miracle baby in the family. He passed away twice when he was born. I will NEVER forget the moment when my daddy came out and told us that Dakota wasn't doing so well. Dakota had the umbilical cord wrapped around his throat and stopped breathing. I was terrified that I wouldn't be able to see him. I remember I went into the Special Care and I held his little fingers and sang to him. I sang him the song my mom always sang to me when I was scared. "Que Sera Sera". I remember singing him that and he didn't take his eyes off me. I remember the 5 long and tiring days my family and I would spend going up to the hospital to see Dakota and staying strong for him. Dakota put up some fight, and I thank God that He made Dakota strong enough to prove all the doctors wrong and get better.
I've always believed that Dakota sees angels or something! I remember over the summer, Dakota and I were playing soccer, and I kicked him the ball...and he just stopped. He just looked up in mid air and just had the BIGGEST smile on his face. I tried getting his attention about 3 times, but he was just mesmerized by something. And then just kept on playing soccer. When he was a baby, I'd always go in his room because he'd wake me up from laughing so much in the middle of the night. I'd go in there and he'd be just a laughing and reaching for something. I remember 2 summers ago, Dakota and I would always get our quilt, make sandwiches and sweet tea, and go outside in our field and have a picnic. At night, we'd go out there and look at the stars. While we were out there looking at the stars one day, he asked me, "Mariah? Who's Jesus?" I told him that Jesus was a man who died on a cross for our sins; and when you die, you get to be with him in Heaven. He said, "Oh....well I've already met him." I just played along and said, "You have?" and he said, "Yeah, when I was a LITTLE tiny baby, he came with me." And I said, "Really? Where'd yall go?" and he said, "I don't know...EVERYWHERE!"...I couldn't say anything! We've never told him that he passed away when he was a baby before, or that he had complications when he was born....but I believe in my heart he DID get to meet Jesus. To hear that come out of 7 year old's mouth (he was 7 at the time), is just...AMAZING!
I love Dakota with all of my heart. He's my best friend and always will be no matter how many fights we get into, no matter how aggravating he will get, no matter how many times I have to tell him to get out of my room, no matter how loud he gets...NO MATTER WHAT! No one can get in between him and me. This little boy right here has my heart and always will. I have NO idea what I'm going to do without this funny, loving, sweet, adorable, little boy everyday when I go off to college in the fall. I won't be the same.
I thank God EVERY single day that He made Dakota my little brother. I thank Him that He let me have the opportunity to be a part of Dakota's life. I thank Him that He let Dakota change my life. I thank Him for letting me seeing a whole different side of life through Dakota. I thank God for just letting Dakota be a part of my life, and a huge part for that matter. Dakota can make me laugh when NO ONE else can. I definitely would NOT be the same person without him. I pray that Dakota gets everything he deserves out of life. I pray that God will let Dakota know that he is loved by SO many people, and that one day, he will change SO many lives just by being himself. I pray that God will always let him be the fun-loving, funny, and sweet little boy he's always been. I pray that God will put Dakota on a path that is his own. I pray that Dakota will follow his dreams and not let ANYONE tell him who to be or what to be. And I pray that Dakota will stay strong throughout the rest of his life just like he's always been. I love you, Dakota. Follow your dreams and NEVER EVER change for anyone!
Dakota wants to go outside and make pictures in the cloud now, so I'm going to go follow in his journey/quest.
Tuesday, December 23, 2008
Healing In Prayer
I think it's amazing how God works. He's opened my eyes throughout my life, but truly, throughout high school. He's brought me some pretty amazing people that have impacted my life, and I know their teachings will carry me throughout my entire life wherever I may go. I want to be a high school math teacher when I get out of school. Everyone thinks I'm crazy for wanting to teach math let alone teaching high school. But I feel like this is the path God wants me to take. He's setting me on this path for a reason, and I attend to follow Him in every way possible. I'm determined, passionate, and stubborn. I'm determined to succeed in everything God throws at me. I'm so thankful for EVERYTHING God has given me and everything that He has let me come in contact with. He has blessed me with THE most amazing family, along with my friends. I wouldn't change anything for this.
I pray that God will keep me on this path He's building for me. I pray that He'll keep me strong and courageous. I pray that He follows me on my path. I pray that I don't give up on myself. I pray that with everything I do, I do it in God's name. I pray that I will trust Him and give everything to Him. I just pray.
I pray that God will keep me on this path He's building for me. I pray that He'll keep me strong and courageous. I pray that He follows me on my path. I pray that I don't give up on myself. I pray that with everything I do, I do it in God's name. I pray that I will trust Him and give everything to Him. I just pray.
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